[ these last few days haven't been the greatest, have they? executions are always bad. trials are no better. three deaths and only one solved during trial itself... well, it's still a better track record than camp. ]
Will you join me for some tea, Dimitri?
[ i have to rewrite part of this light novel chapter from shinobu's pov so have a gentle transition in. ]
[ sadly, it does feel like flew shot closer to the truth than they ever did at camp. not that he feels any better about it, but back then he would pace with anger after trials and executions.
now, he joins her in the courtyard for some tea. ]
Of course.
[ there's the threat of memories, but she's already seen the worst of it, anyway. ]
...I've no eye for such things, but the wisteria are beautiful.
[ it's sad that they've been through enough memshare trauma that now there's not much to worry about. he sets down the books he's borrowed from the library to refill her cup before pouring one for himself. ]
They do suit you.
[ because anyone with eyes can tell that much. ]
You were able to retrieve your clothing too, weren't you? [ her haori. ] I'm glad we can improve our living arrangements, even if it is only small steps forward.
[ it's a little funny to think about how wisteria suits her when she consumed it so she'd basically be wisteria personified but the anthesis of its flower meaning. ]
I was fortunate enough that it could be a gift from home. [ even if she could argue that it could have been something they didn't have to take from her. ] I was going to—
[ but she can't finish that because the wind(?) brings stardust their way.
You have sent a message to Mitsuri Kanroji, asking her to visit you because you've heard some concerning observations about her. When Mitsuri makes the time to come, you ask for her to meet you in the training dojo. She pulls open the door, more nervous than she should be.
"I apologise for intruding... Shinobu?"
You are seated in the center of the dojo with two bamboo swords in front of you. "Hello, Kanroji-san." You don't greet her with your customary smile. You are here to test something, to test her. You stand up and throw one of the swords at her. "Can you spar with me?"
You don't wait for an answer because as soon as she catches the sword, you dart forward with your own bamboo sword.
A wooden sword clatters on the ground, and surprise is evident on her face. You are displeased. It should have not been that easy. Even on instinct, Mitsuri should've been able to avoid that.
"Just now, I did not even use half of my usual ability. Kanroji-san, no matter how careless you were, you should have been able to dodge that easily."
All she can reply with is stutters, and you don't relent. There is something wrong, and you must get to the bottom of it. You cannot afford to be gentle.
"Seems like you aren’t even able to use your Breaths with ease."
"Thi-this... about that...”
You put down your sword with a sigh. Your tone goes from cold and harsh to something more clinical. "The colour of your skin isn’t too good, your cheeks are sunken as well. I suppose you didn’t take in enough nutrients that your muscles need, correct? As a swordsperson, I’m definitely not amazing, but Kanroji-san, you’re different. You have natural flair for the sword, flexible muscles and a body that is naturally powerful. You also have an overly honest personality, all these make you an excellent swordsperson."
You lock your eyes on her before finally asking, "Kanroji-san, why are you making yourself weaker?"
Mitsuri is silent for a long while, her gaze cast to the ground. It's like she suddenly remembers something, and her head snaps up before answering, "—Shinobu, I.” She takes another pause. "I... heard about what happened to you... A member of the Kakushi told me."
You feel your heart sink a little, but your expression is schooled. It doesn't shift. You wait for her to continue.
"... I’m ashamed at my motives for wanting to enter the Slayer Corps... talking about finding a husband, thinking of falling in love.... I’m letting you down, Shinobu. I thought that I should not continue like this, I need to be more decent—but..."
There are things you have never thought. The only thing Mitsuri has done to let you down is not take care of herself.
“I understand now that I can’t that. I need to protect “me” and work hard to raise my skills or I won’t be able to protect anyone else. This is me! Kanroji Mitsuri! Not only do I love everyone I see, I’m also a glutton and a muscle freak... but I— I...love Shinobu the most."
It's those words that finally move you. Your throat constricts, as you try to swallow back some of your emotions. Your voice is warmer, calmer than it has been this entire time:
"—Other than me, there are many from the corps whose relatives were killed by demons. Aoi, Sumi, Chiyo, Naho, their families were also killed by demons and they did not have anywhere else to go so they decided to live here in the end."
Mitsuri lowers her head again.
"However, those girls and I were never envious of your situation, Kanroji-san. Nor do we hate your reason for joining the corps. Even though I was stunned when I heard it for the first time.”
You laugh softly even as Mitsuri makes a noise of surprise.
"If we licked our wounds with hate and sadness, all of us would not be able to move forward. Kanroji-san, your cheerful personality and smile often brings us salvation."
You wait until she raises her head again and can see herself reflected in your eyes.
"So please stop pretending. I love the original Kanroji-san the most."
Before you can say or do anything else, Mitsuri throws her arms around you in a tight hug, tears spilling from her eyes. "Shinobu, Shinobu, Shinobu!"
You think the Mitsuri Kanroji you know and love is finally back.
there are bittersweet notes to this memory, but all in all, it leaves his heart feeling tender and warm. it's one of the nicer memories of the week, and certainly the best one he's seen between the two of them.
he smiles against his teacup. ]
...It was nice to see Mitsuri again. [ he's glad she isn't here, though. ] She's a brilliant person. I'm glad you were able to speak some sense into her.
[ it's a warm memory for shinobu, how mitsuri swung back to being herself, stronger and better than ever. it was both sweet and sad that mitsuri thought enough about shinobu's circumstances that it affected her breathing even if it was harmful for everyone. ]
Kanroji-san has always been the loveliest of all of us. [ shinobu is also glad mitsuri isn't here, but she could have been. ] One of the best things about her is how flexible and receptive she is.
[ it's both what makes mitsuri so wonderful and yet so mystifying. it's healing, but it is also a headache. some people are plain foolish and deserve to be thrown out. ]
A little kindness can go a long way. A little love can last a long time. I'm also glad I was able to meet someone like her.
Mm. Those sorts of meetings and memories are a salvation.
[ he isn't as nice as mitsuri, but he respects what she does. kindness at the right place and the right time can change someone so much. as the stardust is kicked around by a breeze, another memory stirs with it.
You don't recognize Castle Fhirdiad anymore. It is a consequence of the attack in Duscur emptying out your trusted palace staff and filling it with strangers: you learn quickly they do not have your best interests at heart, as the best of them are awkward and avoidant, and the worst are intent on keeping you imprisoned in your own home under the guise of safety.
So the first tragedy of your life was losing your family—the second is almost facing the aftermath alone.
But if the Goddess exists, she sent you one gift: Dedue. You busy yourself with teaching him your language as he guides you through his own, and you delight in realizing you can communicate with each other in more than broken sentences and arm-flapping charades. He is a boy of few words, but he is blessed with patience and an even-keeled temperament that you've never had, and you trust each other implicitly.
However, if the castle is unsafe for you, it's doubly so for him. The people of Duscur are reviled for crimes they didn't commit, and no one is pleased that he has a place so close to your side. So it only makes sense for him to stay in your quarters as often as necessary—you don't want him harassed when you turn your back, especially since he can understand the words that people spit at him now.
But you have a not-so-ulterior motive for having him here as well, one that you're sure that Dedue has realized. Otherwise he wouldn't agree to be here tonight on a spare bedroll as you're flopped in bed, gesticulating absently while you talk about nothing and everything. You chatter about training today, the new technique you've perfected, the fact that you're getting better with a sword and not just a spear, the fact that you saw your uncle Rufus trip on the first step of the staircase today, how you think your pronounciation is improving, but you can tell it's not there yet.
"Still, I'm sure it will be more natural with practice. You're a diligent teacher, Dedue. You know—"
He answers occasionally, amused, exchanging the occasional story of his own. He doesn't talk much about his home, but he'll offer his opinion (you train too much, and your uncle deserves to fall on his face) and soft hums when he has nothing better to contribute.
Eventually, your words stop making sense, because you're drifting off, fading in and out of sentences. This is often the only way you ever rest—if you do not exhaust yourself talking to Dedue, you're too afraid to sleep. So you talk, and he listens, and sometimes drags on until dawn, and sometimes this happens, where you're blinking for longer and longer, going quieter and quieter until even your mumbling wears itself out.
Before you finally fall asleep, you think you hear him say,
[ she is glad dimitri had dedue, that they had each other. with the state of his caslte, the development of their friendship is both sweet and bittersweet. the support between the two of them brings feelings of fondness even if she's reminded of her own nightmares.
she smiles even as the memory makes her take a closer look at dimitri. has he been sleeping? ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
w3, sunday
Will you join me for some tea, Dimitri?
[ i have to rewrite part of this light novel chapter from shinobu's pov so have a gentle transition in. ]
no subject
now, he joins her in the courtyard for some tea. ]
Of course.
[ there's the threat of memories, but she's already seen the worst of it, anyway. ]
...I've no eye for such things, but the wisteria are beautiful.
no subject
I think you have eye enough. Beauty is subjective, in any case.
[ her smile is fond. ]
I've always thought they were wonderful, but I'm biased.
no subject
They do suit you.
[ because anyone with eyes can tell that much. ]
You were able to retrieve your clothing too, weren't you? [ her haori. ] I'm glad we can improve our living arrangements, even if it is only small steps forward.
no subject
I was fortunate enough that it could be a gift from home. [ even if she could argue that it could have been something they didn't have to take from her. ] I was going to—
[ but she can't finish that because the wind(?) brings stardust their way.
help this was so long i'm sorry ]
no subject
there are bittersweet notes to this memory, but all in all, it leaves his heart feeling tender and warm. it's one of the nicer memories of the week, and certainly the best one he's seen between the two of them.
he smiles against his teacup. ]
...It was nice to see Mitsuri again. [ he's glad she isn't here, though. ] She's a brilliant person. I'm glad you were able to speak some sense into her.
no subject
Kanroji-san has always been the loveliest of all of us. [ shinobu is also glad mitsuri isn't here, but she could have been. ] One of the best things about her is how flexible and receptive she is.
She loves so much.
[ she loves too much. ]
no subject
[ which is a lot, and even he can't manage that much genuine emotion. it's amazing to him that someone like that could stay so positive and sweet. ]
I know your world was full of hardship, but I am glad you had someone like her with you. You're right in that a smile can do so much.
[ people like mitsuri can save people in a way that he never could. ]
no subject
[ it's both what makes mitsuri so wonderful and yet so mystifying. it's healing, but it is also a headache. some people are plain foolish and deserve to be thrown out. ]
A little kindness can go a long way. A little love can last a long time. I'm also glad I was able to meet someone like her.
We all help people in our own way.
no subject
Mm. Those sorts of meetings and memories are a salvation.
[ he isn't as nice as mitsuri, but he respects what she does. kindness at the right place and the right time can change someone so much. as the stardust is kicked around by a breeze, another memory stirs with it.
So the first tragedy of your life was losing your family—the second is almost facing the aftermath alone.
But if the Goddess exists, she sent you one gift: Dedue. You busy yourself with teaching him your language as he guides you through his own, and you delight in realizing you can communicate with each other in more than broken sentences and arm-flapping charades. He is a boy of few words, but he is blessed with patience and an even-keeled temperament that you've never had, and you trust each other implicitly.
However, if the castle is unsafe for you, it's doubly so for him. The people of Duscur are reviled for crimes they didn't commit, and no one is pleased that he has a place so close to your side. So it only makes sense for him to stay in your quarters as often as necessary—you don't want him harassed when you turn your back, especially since he can understand the words that people spit at him now.
But you have a not-so-ulterior motive for having him here as well, one that you're sure that Dedue has realized. Otherwise he wouldn't agree to be here tonight on a spare bedroll as you're flopped in bed, gesticulating absently while you talk about nothing and everything. You chatter about training today, the new technique you've perfected, the fact that you're getting better with a sword and not just a spear, the fact that you saw your uncle Rufus trip on the first step of the staircase today, how you think your pronounciation is improving, but you can tell it's not there yet.
"Still, I'm sure it will be more natural with practice. You're a diligent teacher, Dedue. You know—"
He answers occasionally, amused, exchanging the occasional story of his own. He doesn't talk much about his home, but he'll offer his opinion (you train too much, and your uncle deserves to fall on his face) and soft hums when he has nothing better to contribute.
Eventually, your words stop making sense, because you're drifting off, fading in and out of sentences. This is often the only way you ever rest—if you do not exhaust yourself talking to Dedue, you're too afraid to sleep. So you talk, and he listens, and sometimes drags on until dawn, and sometimes this happens, where you're blinking for longer and longer, going quieter and quieter until even your mumbling wears itself out.
Before you finally fall asleep, you think you hear him say,
"Good night, Dimitri." ]
no subject
she smiles even as the memory makes her take a closer look at dimitri. has he been sleeping? ]
You are both lucky to have each other.